heartaches the size of houses...

i'm still in the office. lately, sleep eludes me unless i'm totally exhausted from staying awake... so i don't bother going home early anymore just to lie on my bed for hours on end and stare at the celing boards, willing my eyelids to close. i stay behind to do my own stuff. watching, hoping for a message on msn from her but the silence is shattering. her handle has been on my offline list for three months... and still counting. only way i can feel her, to have a resemblace of what we shared before is to surf through her weblog. i read and reread her entries. and now i understand the weight and pain in this particular entry of hers, because this is exactly what i feel now:

she said, "these twilight hours when all are asleep but me. when there are no other illuminated windows. those bends in time when i'm propelled into another space and and another place, while sitting there still very much physically in the present. when the person whose company i'm craving for isn't there, but merely a figure in my imagination. these twilight hours i lapse into heartaches the size of houses.

And lately i've upgraded... traded in all my heartaches the size of houses for one the size of a small nation..."



Track Of The Day: Damien Rice - Blower's Daughter