Thursday, November 18, 2004

A royal love story

So yea.. I got an SMS from her a few days back, before eid...

"Quick be happy for me, I'm getting married... and you're invited :)"

Oh don't get me wrong, I am happy for her but sometimes I wish she wouldn't get married(or rather, anyone that I'm attached to physically and emotionally.. yes, I'm selfish like that) and we could just be like we used to back then... good friends, sometimes lovers... But reality is never as easy as you want it to be ain't it? It's harder to sustain a relationship with her, especially when she's royalty... I used to call her my Tuan Puteri when I first met her, just because she is... A princess of the royal family from my "kampung", a Bandar DiRaja. She was just like any other normal girl... well normal in the sense that royalty did not ooze in obnoxious amounts from her pores. No aloofness, no high and mighty I'm-above-you-peasants attitudes. She was friendly and always smiling from the word go.

My... well... friendship with her was surreal... we floated in the limbo that people would call between being good friends and sometimes lovers. That wide expanse of gray that overlaps in both directions but draws a really thin line between us. We would acknowledge each other's adoration with equal if not more attention, and vice versa... ad infinitum. We got each other matching lava lamps for our own bachelor/bachelorette pads.. bought RM100++ water guns and proceeded to drench each other down to our underwears... piggy back rides on/by each other... buying 2 of every muffins available and overdosing on them... spending hours basking in each other company, just talking and smoking on the rooftops... walking the night beaches... throwing each other adoring looks but pretend to look away if the other party catches us staring... We were lovers like that... though not to the world, but we were almost...

And I was called stupid by a girlfriend(who used to work with us back then) when she said she wanted to leave to be a stewardess. When in actual fact, she left because of me... because her heart does not allow her stay around a guy that refuses to move their relationship forward. Like all guys, I was as dense as a ten ton steel block, staying put... emotionless... oblivious as fuck. Sometimes, I wish girls would be straightforward because I am as obtuse as... well a guy. But it doesn't work that way ain't it? It's always about mind games... *sighs*

It didn't help that religion got in our... well, my way. I so wanted to be with her, and it didn't help that I have an utter weakness for malay girls... and I'll do almost anything to be with one. Seriously, I'm not against converting... BUT I am against forced conversion. I could live even without her converting to my religion... we could because love is not about religion which in turn should not be about forcing or drawing boundaries right? Sometimes, I wish we could just run away somewhere and live just as we are and not let little things like this bother us but she could never shirk her royal tag... especially not in favour for a nobody like me. So here I am.. typing back an SMS to her... congratulating and wishing her all the best and reminiscing the good old days.. wondering if she ever think back and see me standing here, with these good memories... Do you miss me O? Cos' I sure as hell miss you today, more than ever... cos' you've just moved one more unattainable step away from me, forever...

"Goodbye to the sky... I know I can’t fly but I feel love... Do you know how I feel... You are my achilles heel..."

Track Of The Day: Toploader - Achilles Heel

Wednesday, November 17, 2004

Meeting girls

Its funny that when you're single, people deem its neccessary for them to hook you up with their "Anyways, I have this pretty/cute/babe/sexy/hot friend of mine that you should meet..."

So there I was, a whole weekend and summore night out with friends. I've met so many Michelles, Amandas and Jessicas... their faces are starting to meld into one big mess of names O.o Not a good sign when they come back around again later, all friendly like(after one too many Margarita or Vodkas) and especially when they remember your name(even when they're stumbling around just as bad as I am) and for the love of God, you don't remember theirs!! AGH! Well, the free-flowing alcohol wasn't helping either, lolzx. So there I was, sitting and smiling at every girl who could be bothered to remember my name...

girls: "You don't talk much do you Seth?" *smiles*
me: uhm yea *shrugs* haha... *silence*

And they smile and walk away. Cue me banging my head on the table... and the background laughter of my assholic-as-usual friends. There should be a quota rule against too many girls having names like Michelles, Amandas and Jessicas. Seriously... *sighs* But on another note.. I've been coerced(by my friends and the girls, though I think the girls were doing it becos my friends "forced" them too.. hur hur. Yeah, and lets not forget the alcohol... lolzx) to trade numbers with them girls *grins*... not a bad thing but when you have to put Amanda#1, Amanda#2 etc etc on your phone number list, It all goes back to square one: who's face fits which Amanda... *thinks* Aww bugger...! *sighs*

Well so far, it's been a good weekend and I had me some good fun... Eid mubarak to my muslim friends and a good hols to the non-muslim ones.... Frost out...

Track Of The Day: Moby - Porcelain

1st year, 1st company dinner

So I've been here for slightly over a year already and this is my first company dinner. We had a scrumptious japanese buffet (mmmm, shashimi!) and a cart load of sake (yum yum yum.. mmmm).

So.. yeah... I've nothing much to say about this new place when it comes to dinners and parties. This is a clean, unadulterated company. And when I say that, it means that the people here are so on the straight and true path, it makes me feel super awkward mingling with em, haha! So yea.. everybody had fun eating and drinking and that was it... Well, coming from companies with less savoury characters, this was like a 6 years old and below Disneyland ride *chuckles* Drinking was very orderly, Body contact was kept to a minimal, no hugging, no kissing, no fun... lolzx.

Which reminds me back in the "old days", a good party would encompass.. first: excellent food... second: copious amounts of liquor and third: a bunch of unihibited people... *laughs* I still remember, of the top of my head.. messing up a restaurant, trashing a hotel room, partying till we either dropped or was semi nekkid from all the drunk-dares, waking up next to strangers in a room full of equally strange people sleeping on the bed, sofas, floor.. yea, I've been there, done that... There were some other stuff that me and my ex-colleagues do which I shall refrain from mentioning here, lolzx. Things that will go down in the annals of bawdilicious history :P Well unless them people don't mind I spit out here on the blog for everybody to read.. hey, anonymity is still preserved somewhat.. and I doubt them folks from the advertising people look at this blog.. uhm, I hope not.. *frowns* :P

So yea... 1st company dinner at my new place... it's a nice change of pace methinks... but I can help but reminisce on the good old days, when the people are uninhibited, the girls are willing, the clothes came off easily and the drink were a-plenty ^^

Track Of The Day: Gus Gus - Polyesterday

Tuesday, November 02, 2004

a saturday night liquor boosted inane chat

A weird liquor boosted conversation session on a chill out saturday night

-Sitting at a bar with two friends-

girl 1 : Wow Sethy, that girl over there, is that your girlfriend or urm.. your ex? *looks over my shoulder to the other end of the bar*

me: Who? Oh her? The one petite one with the long hair? Yea, kind of..

girl 2: What do you mean kind of? *looks at me with a puzzled frown*

me: Well, we used to kinda live together and stuff so yea, I guess so...

girl 2: *whaps me* oh please be a man and own up okay? *roll eyes*

girl 1 : yea lar.. c'mon.. you lived together. Technically that counts as a relationship you know? *Roll eyes*

me: Okay okay okayyyy... sheesh...

-We then sat and drank a little bit more, ogling at the crowd of beautiful people. My erm.. ex came over for a quick chat, some introductions and went back to dancing with her friends...-

girl 2: Damn Sethy, she's so cute!~ She's not chinese right? She doesn't look 'yellow' *chuckles*

me: *nods* yea she's not *frowns* YELLOW! *looks back at ex* cute? really meh?

girl 2 : Heck yea.. she is... petite and curves all at the right places *winks* But she's kinda stuck up no...? *looks over at my ex walking away*

me: What? Shit girl, what do you expect? For her to come up, french kiss and fondle you? She just met you!~

girl 1 : *groans* Well.. MMmmmm... that would be good!~ *laughs*

girl 2 : *laughs* Yea.. I'm so damn horny right now.. I would really like to get it on with your ex-GF.. NOW! *grins*

me: *sighs* Well, not everybody's a les slut like you girls okay? Heck, both of you can have a piece of each other.

girl 1: Been there, done that... we want somebody new *chuckles*

me: What? a new partner to share between both of you or a F-F-F threesome? *look at the girls sideways*

girl 1&2: That would be good.. an F-F-F threesome!~ *laughs in unison*

me: You both are seriously twisted and fucked up.

girl 1: Yep, that's why you like us! Hell I bet you want to see us do the les thing in front of you right? right?

girl 2: Yea! Don't lie.. say yes..!!!

me: *mumbles*

girl 1&2: Hrm? What's that?

me: *louder* well, yea.. of course.. Which sane horny hetero guy wouldn't want to see two girls getting their jiggy on with each other? >.<

girl 1&2: *laughs* We knew it!~ Sethy you're such a perv!~

me: Yea yea yea.. whatever... since you guy are at it, I would like to join in as well :P

*This is the part where I get blue-blacks on my thighs n ribs.. OUCHZORZ!~*

Well the conversation grew quite boring from then onwards and heck no I didn't get to see 2 les get it on.. agh, saddddd, lolzx...

Track Of The Day: Hooverphonic - 2wicky